Saturday, February 27, 2010

Did you say wind???

Well holy crap.....now they say we gonna get a hurricane. Not that I'm skeered of a hurricane, it's just all the work involved in hurricane preparation. Now yesterday was a windy day also, but old Billy Bob survived with no ill effects. Other then being pissed off and cuss'n.

Speak'n of cuss'n....what's with this crap they pull'n out in California with a "no cuss'n" week? Can ya imagine what this world would be if ya can't use Webster cuss words? Like...."oh darn, I smashed my finger with this "cute" hammer...darn it to git out".

Fish'n sucks!!! Been had them poles in the water for hours and not a single bite. But let me tell ya bout yesterday. Caught me up 6 them suckers and put them in the freezer. Run'n out of room...gotta eat up some them pork chops and chicken. Got 22 trout in there now and need room for 25 more. That should last me a couple months.

Ok....got fish'n to do....see ya laters.

See what I were tell'n ya? That wind come up from every direction. Put in the awning way this morn'n cause I knowed it was gonna blow. But....here come the rain....WTH??? I had done forgot bout the rain and went to sit in that chair, what was still wet, and boy howdy....my ass wet.

Even though the weather sucked today, I have 3 nice trout in the sack. Get'n tired of clean'n fish, but somebody gotta do it. Took 2 pork chops out the freezer for supper tonight, but them 3 fish will take up more room than them pork chops.....can't win for los'n. As much as I made for supper, all fish for the next 3 days will go in the freezer. Boy howdy is old pesky neighbor Wayne gonna be proud of me.

Friday, February 26, 2010

So little time

Here it is another week go by and old Billy Bob ain't done a thing. But I planned it that way. Ya see, it's like this.....the day I retired, I told myself I ain't gonna work no more. So...everything I do is for my pleasure in any way I can find it. Like sit'n on "da porch" sip'n a cup with think'n on my mind...swak'n golf balls...or sit'n on the bank fish'n....or mak'n stuff.....or just "do'n nuttin". But...there come a time when ya got to consider if'n that stuff is a healthy way of living. You know....like too much caffeine....wear and tear on the mind....golf elbow....eat'n too much fish....and get'n butt blisters.

Now it comes a time in my life when I got to figger out what I gonna do. I got one more week of sit'n on the bank fish'n and then I got to move out to another hunt'n ground. The weather in Deming absolutely sucks so that's out for another couple weeks or so. So...what ya gonna do Billy Bob???

That fall out that chair done put a hurt'n on my. Although it is getting a little better, I'm think'n maybe I done broke something or bruised some highly proficient internal organs. All I know's is I hurt something terrible.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Go'n to jail????

After much consideration and frustration, old Billy Bob went back in time to the old age tradition of the use of fly'n creatures in his endeavor to "catch a fish". Ya see, here what I done.....I catched one them osprey birds and tie a rope to him. Then send him fly'n over da pond. He swoop down and pick them fish right out the water and I reel in the rope. Put that fish in the fish bag.

Yesterday I catched me some fish. But I may be go'n to jail. Seems the Arizona Fish and Game put a limit on how many fish ya can catch in one day. I got me 10 them suckers in that dish pan....all ready for the freezer and fry pan. Catch them one after the other....just like that.

Gotta make that Walmart run some time today. Run slap out of drugs and the dogs ain't got no food. Fix 'em up hamburgers and biscuits last night. All I had was a freak'n fish.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

After the storm

Boy howdy what a grand look'n day. There ain't a ripple on the water and sun shin'n like ya don't know what. What more could ya want after all that wind and clouds we had yesterday?

See that chair??? That the sucker what throwed me on the ground. When I get over this mess, that chair go'n in the dumpster. 

Now that I'm up and mov'n round a bit, think I'll go outside and rake the yard.
Speak'n of rak'n the yard, Lug Nut was gold prospect'n.
 Speak'n of gold prospect'n....did I ever tell ya bout the time? Me and Boudreaux  was "dig'n dirt" up at Goler canyon and throw'n it in the Gold Machine. Well there weren't no gold in that dirt. Boudreaux liked to dig so he fount him a dig'n place under a bush....dug out a big ole pile. I says what the heck...run it through the machine. Yep....gold. Enough for me to do some my own dig'n under that bush. Yep...no gold. I sure do miss that 30,000 mile "dirt dig'n" dog and dig'n dirt myself. But "shit happens". He died and old Billy Bob can't dig no more.

Did I tell ya bout that fish I almost caught yesterday? Well it's like this...the wind was blow'n up a storm and old Billy Bob was sit'n in "da house" look'n out the winder at them fish poles. I went outside to check them and the lines was all tangle up...what the hell? I reels them in and on the end of one line was this big ole bass fish. Nice one. Well....ya know what gonna happen. Along with that cheap fish 4# fish line and them damn reeds....fish gone....poooof...just like that. Now....how the hell a bass git on my trout fish line???

Well shoot....now I got mouses in "da house". That what Lug Nut been go'n nuts over. He hear things I don't. Set me out a couple traps with peanut butter as bait and caught me up 2 them little critters in the first hour. Better than fish'n. Rekon I better buy me some them electronic gobber-do's next trip to Walmart.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Terrible Saturday

Holy cows!!! What the hell??? Where me other shoe??? Here fishy fishy fishy.

Let me tell ya.....this crap sucks!!! My freak'n computer is do'n weird stuff, had a spend yesterday lay'n on the floor, could'n catch no fish, Lug Nut got loose and I missed a 3 foot putt. Gonna have to do something different.

Now this computer...the damn thing is turn'n off my internet connection all by it self. Then it says "I can't find any connections". What the hell is that??? I'm think'n I maybe got me one them virus thingys somewhere and my virus protection is in kahoots with it. I reset the router back to factory settings, rebooted the pc, ran a virus scan....nothing. Hell....I don't know.

Yeah...yesterday was spent on da floor. Something ain't right. Another sleepless night (friday) and barely able to get the coffee pot brewing. Much less go outside and throw them poles in the water. So....I got to think'n. Everything was ok till I fell out that chair. Now, if'n ya fall out a chair, especially if you're old and loose, something gonna happen. Even though I'm a tough old guy, I ain't make out of cast iron no more. I rekon I done went and pull some muscles or pop one them disc's out of place. This morning I feel a little better than yesterday, so we gonna see what happen.

Now let me tell ya bout this damn camera. There was a big bird fly'n round what was steal'n my fish....just fly down to the water and pick one up. I took some pics of him fly'n round and was gonna post one, but when I went look'n for them...they was gone. Not on the card and not in the camera memory. So where the hell is my pics???

Caught me up two fish yesterday for last nights supper, but ate biscuits and bacon instead. Now, the reason I done that was so I would have something to eat tonight...just in case there ain't no fish caught today. I know what I'm do'n!!!

Later or not..............

Friday, February 19, 2010

What day it is???

One my favorite thoughts is that yesterday is gone...poof...just like that. Don't waste your time try'n to figger out what went wrong. Today is a new day....a beautiful day. "My God Billy Bob, what the hell are ya talk'n bout"???

This morn'n I pull myself out of bed wonder'n if'n I gonna make it of not. Sleep didn't come easy last night with the excitement of catch'n a bunch of fish today and my back hurt'n. After the first pot of coffee, I notice my back feel'n much better. Since I took me a bunch of cranberry pills yesterday, I'm think'n I might have a kidney infection or something like that. Will know in a couple more days.

I come "this" close to eat'n catfish for dinner tonight. Had him all the ways up to the bank and he took a run to the reeds. That where I lose my dinner. But I gots two small trout in the bag to go with some fried green beans cook in bacon grease with some onion and broke up bacon. Tater wedges on da side.

All them trout they turn loose yesterday is hid'n somewhere. Although, I did catch a couple this morn'n....ain't hide nor hair since. Ain't nobody catch'n any.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Broke down back

oy howdy!!! That fall out that chair did a number on me. All day long all I did was sit an moan how bad I got it. Can't stand up straight and every time I take a breath of life giving air it's like a knife blade pok'n me right here.
First I thought it were my kidneys so's I been double dos'n on cranberry pills....to no avail.

Today the fish guy showed up and dump a load of fish in the pond. They was swim'n out cross that water like they was "free".

Well, that didn't do much good for old Billy Bob 'cause they was all on the other side scoot'n for cover. I did manage to snag me up one, but it was too little. Bout 3 bite, that sucker be gone. I rekon fish'n will be better after them fish figger out the only food they gonna get, old Billy Bob put on that hook. Ya don't rekon they might be a mite shocked after the ride to "da pond" do ya??? With the temps (80 degs) I would imagine them fish ain't gonna live very long. Sure wish I were somewhere that's cooler. This heat is git'n to me. Make me sweat and smell like a goat....and I ain't us'n my precious coffee water for a shower. I'm think'n I may make it back to Deming where I can take a loooong shower.

I were gonna not shave till I was catch'n fish...just let it grow out and look like a old timey prospector. Well, since I have one fish under my belt, I just shave off a little bit. Now I gonna look like a billy goat.

All is well 'cept'n for my back giv'n me a fit. Maybe tomorrow it be better.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Broke down fish pole

Ok Billy Bob, now what ya gonna do since ya broke yer fish pole???
"I knows 'zackly what I gonna do. Gonna go to Walmart and buy me a new one".
And that exactly what I do. But...ya know how it is when ya ain't been to Walmart in a long time...ya buy stuff. Stuff ya don't need. Costed me almost a hunert dollar just so's I can fish and catch no fish. I always been want'n one them fancy spin reels...now I got one. Plus a brand spank'n new fish pole just like the one I broke. Well...the pole ain't broke, but I done wore the reel slap out. Then....I had to have me some more bait to throw out in da water where there ain't no fish. Yep...old Billy Bob all ready to catch me a bunch of fish. Now, what I were think'n while I was sit'n out there fish'n, was what more could an old retired fart want out of life sides lay'n back and do'n nuttin? Here what I have to look at all day...can't beat that with a big ol' stick.

Plumb forgot to take anything out the freezer for supper, so ya know what I gonna be eat'n. Well, I doctor up that pot of burn chili with a can of maters, pick out all them black burn thingys, cook me up a batch of elbow noodle thingys and there ya have it.....supper. Still sucks!!!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Burnt chili

My God Billy Bob, what the hell did ya do to the chili?
"Well, it like this....I were outside watch'n my fish pole when I doze off and all sudden I hears "smoke"
Ya ain't gonna eat it are ya?
"And exactly what do you suppose I gonna eat since I ain't catch no fish"

That's the way it happen... I ate burnt chili for dinner.... and yes it sucked.

Speak'n of burnt beans....my first one wife liked to cook stuff "fast". I were lean'n on the fence talk'n to my neighbor and he holler..."there's smoke com'n out your kitchen...should I call the fire department"??? I just and says...no, that's ok, my wife is just cook'n dinner. She had put a pot of pintos on high heat and went back to watch'n t/v. Need I say more???

Monday, February 15, 2010

Wonderful day at "da pond"

Boy howdy, did ya see the sunshine and stuff outside? It almost summer time. Today suppose to be 79 degs....just perfect for sit'n outside on da porch sip'n a cup with the fish pole in the water.

Yistyerday I posted a pic.....it were took last year 'cause I ain't took one this year. I think it were that old coot up in Dallas what say something bout that bicycle....so let me tell ya bout that bicycle. A while back my doc told me I need to exercise....so I went to Walmart and bought me a brand spank'n new bicycle. I rode it around the park in Deming a few time but it made me tired...and cranky. Then I figger I would put a motor on it and get lots of exercise start'n it. But a motor won't fit. Then it got a flat tire...and now it sits there just "do'n nuttin".

Today I gots to do up the dishes...but I don't want to use up my coffee water. So it's down to the pond with a load of dirty dishes. Seem like a mans work is never done. Lug Nut do a good job wash''n dishes but this stuff is crusted on to the point he would never get them clean enough to cook in.

Ok....gotta go throw the pole in the water...catch me some fish.

Now ya done went an done it Billy Bob...ya done pull a "fall out that chair" stunt. Ya see...it were like this, I were sit'n there in my Walmart lawn chair and I reach for my coffee cup and all a sudden that chair just fall over....toss'n old Billy Bob on his ass. Once old Billy Bob get down like that, it take a while to get back up. And when I did....Oh crap....that hurt like the dickins. Spend all afternoon hunch up like "hunch back" in that movie I can't spell.....with the acid and stuff. What was his name...Egor or something like that??? Anyhows, I took me a hand full of drugs and feel'n no pain.

No....I didn't catch no fish. But I ain't give up...yet.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Four fish

Ok....I done got it all figger out. Old Billy Bob ain't never been skunk when it come to fish'n, but things ain't look'n too good. There ain't but four fish in this pond. I caught one the other day and then this morn'n I snag another one. Now, if I'm think'n right, there ain't but two left....what causes a big problem. I were depend'n on catch'n fish for my meals 'cause I didn't bring no groceries with me "cept'n for a sack of flour and some bacon. And I get'n tired of eat'n biscuits and bacon three time a day. Hehehehe...read that in one my shoot'em up cowboy books. 

Speak'n of groceries....do ya ever wonder what go'n on when all ya find at the stores is "low calorie", "low sodium", "low fat", "no sugar added" type of stuff???? My concern is if this stuff is being forced on us....specially me since I need all the fat and calories I can get. Now don't be gonna tell me this stuff is healthy 'cause I ain't listen to that crap. Healthy food put meat on your bones, not take it off. By the way....I don't eat beef. Well maybe just a little.....like a hamburger once a month or something like that. But if'n I were to buy me a steak, it would be one them with a 1 inch ring of fat all the way round. Fry that sucker up blood rare and save all them fat drip'n for some gravy. That healthy!!!

For some ya folk what don't know where old Billy Bob at, I'm 9 mile from downtown Yuma, Az. at a place call Fortuna Pond....what ain't no bigger than bout 125 yard wide and bout maybe a quarter mile long....or something like that. What ya figger....bout 8 acres??? If'n I was to swak a golf ball cross it I could tell exactly how wide it are. Look like a 8 iron from here.


Saturday, February 13, 2010

They got away

Well shoot....I ain't got nuttin to write about.

Did I ever tell ya bout the time.....I were liv'n on the farm and we six kids walked 3 1/2 mile to school. Well, last time I were in Missouri, I went to the old farm house and the old school house. The old farm house is still there but the old school house ain't.... 'cept'n for the foundation and basement. Burn to the ground way back in bout '49 or "50. In my motor home I have a piece of the roof gutter what I fount lay'n on the ground. In the middle of the basement was an old coal furnace what kept us warm in the winter. Most of it is still there. Out on a big ol' tree is the remnants of the rope swing still tied to that limb.

That old rope swing bring back the memories of when I were a daredevil...evil Billy Bob. I would swing that thing till the teacher yell..."Billy, git out that swing". That when I do my evil jump...fly through the air like superman. Well them sissy boys dare me one time to jump out the other way....downhill. What I did. I were yell'n.... "mom's....I'm bleed'n". I skeer't that teacher lady plumb to death. I tored my brand spank'n new homemade shirt, skin't up my elbows and had a rooster egg bump on my head.

Then fish's just ain't gonna get in my fry pan. I sit out there all day long put'n on more bait and throw'n it back out. Two fishes gobbled up on my line and headed for the cat tail reeds. That were the last time I see them. I 'spect they were somewheres round 5 pounds or more....and old Billy Bob knows what he talk'n bout.
Big'uns always get away. Ask any fisherman.

Finish off the spaghetti tonight since there weren't no fish to cook up. Even had enough for Lug Nut and Sadie Mae. Hope they don't poot all night long.

Speak'n of poot'n.....I were mind'n my own business in Walmart one time when I got this urge. I turn down this aisle where there weren't no people. Gonna let off a little quiet one. Well, ya know what gonna happen. That right....I rip a loud one....like a trumpet. Two old ladies had just come round the corner and one says to the other..."did you fart"? Hehehehe....I were gone.....pooot....just like that. Me and girlfriend was eat'n at this really nice "greasy spoon" when I got the urge.....let it out easy Billy Bob. Nope...Billy Bob don't do nuttin easy. Then I just lean back and look at girlfriend with that "did you fart?" look. Everyone else was look'n at her too. Boy howdy did I pay for that one.

Ok...I'm done...out of here!!!  

Friday, February 12, 2010

Plan gone sour

Woke up this morn'n with a plan in mind. I were gonna catch me a bunch of fish. Throw my pole in the water and sit back just wait'n. That when Lug Nut says to me...."dad, the game warden want to talk to ya". See, I tole ya, they was wait'n in the bushes for me to catch a fish, then jump out and take me to jail. Ha Ha Ha....I were done ahead that guy. I whip out my Walmart fish license what I got yesterday and all is well.

But bout noon time I had me a plan what I were gonna do with all them fish I was gonna catch. Have me a big ol' fish dinner with some Ranch beans and some fried taters. Ha....look like I gonna be eat'n spaghetti what left over from the slabs. Now don't get me wrong, I knows how to fish...been do'n it for years. Remember that big ol' lightning strike the other night....the one I almost pee my pants??? Well it skeered them fish so bad they still hid'n in the bushes. And the water is still a mite muddy from all the rain. You wait till tomorrow fishes....Billy Bob gonna git ya.

Speak'n of spaghetti, have ya ever put chili powder and LoseAnna red in the sauce. Learnt that trick many years ago when I didn't have any Italian seasoning. Been eat'n it that way ever since....yum yum eat'm up. I rekon I got me enough for tomorrow night just in case them fish's don't cooperate....but I'm think'n Lug Nut and Sadie Mae will be eat'n spaghetti tomorrow night.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Free fish

Got to say....just love the comments I get. Beano????

Holy cows....it were cold this morning. I were all wrap up in my blankets and Lug Nut started his danc'n routine again. Winders were all fogged up...couldn't see a thing. Crank the heat up to 85 degs....just kid'n River. Put on a pot of coffee and work'n on get'n that other eye open. Gonna be a good day...I can see it now.

Yesterday night just before sundown, I throwed a line in the water with bait tied to the end and low and behold...I catched my first "illegal" fish. I look at it and says..."what ya gonna do with that fish Billy Bob"??? Well shoot, I'm gonna eat it. What I did.

Today I got to make that trip to Walmart and buy me a fish license. When ya get older, like I done, ya start to think'n bout go'n to jail and stuff like that. In the great State of Arizona they sell us a "tourist" license for bout $35 what last for 4 months...trout stamp included. That is part of the cost for "free fish".

When I were talk'n bout a propane leak, I weren't talk'n a big leak. I'm think'n when I hooked up my little tank, that where the leak were. But, yes, I gonna check all the fit'ns just to make sure. Where my Bic???

I rekon I'll be back later.....

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Fix'n clocks in da rain

Fix'n clocks in da rain.....don't know what I talk'n bout....do ya??? Well, it's like this....I were sit'n here at the laptop read'n the news, sip'n coffee and mind'n my own business...when I hears a big engine crank up. It were that feller from Canada name John what was camped in a really nice spot...he were pull'n out. Ya never guess who in that spot now. He even went out in the cold water and cleared them reeds for me a spot for my fish'n. 
That's clockwork my friends.

Yeah, it rained last night and they talk'n bout get'n some more today. It not that I don't like rain, I just don't like it at the same place I'm at....simple as that...rain sucks. Have ya ever sit around a campfire while it rain'n? Now, here what I gonna do....when the BLM ranger come by and ask me when I got here, I gonna tell him "as soon as the sun shines". Ain't gonna be count'n days when it rain'n or the sun ain't shin'n.

I think it were old Uncle Ben ask if I still hav'n battery problems. Well....yep I sure am. Isolated the engine battery yesterday....just to check...and walla...this morning that battery were dead as a door knob. Then I think it were the same person what ask if I repaired my propane leak.....nope, not yet. 

Ok....now I got things to do.......laters!!!

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

It cold in here

Boy howdy....it's cold in here. Bout 6am right on the dot, Lug Nut was do'n his danc'n act this morn'n want'n out NOW. He was in need....mark bushes and stuff. Well, I says...."turn on the heat and make some coffee". Ok. But I ain't got no heat. Propane gone...pooof....just like that. Hmmmmm....where it at??? Leak out Billy Bob...ya got a leak. Do ya suppose that why my BIG tank run out?

Any hows, now I have a good excuse to put in the slide outs, pick up the rest my junk, hook up "that jeep" and hit the road. Or...I could run down to the propane sell'n place and buy some more propane....but shoot, it gonna leak out too. Yeah, I know, leak test'n time.

Did I tell ya bout what I did yesterday? Had only three things to do...put some gas in "that jeep", fill my water jugs and dump the trash. I pull up to the gas pumps....no problem. Then I go's round to get water....big motorhome block'n the faucets. So's I head over to the dumpster....unbuckle my safety harness (seat belt), shut the engine off, climb out and open the back door where the trash bags at....hey, where my trash??? Forgot it...back at da house. Sheesh!!!....get'n old sucks.

Will be back laters....got some stuff to do. Head'n to da pond.

9:30am....well shoot, that didn't take long. Only thing left to do is dismantle the satellite dish and hoop up "that jee[". So....I'm out of here!!!!

3:30PM....well I want ya lookie here. I done been all over southern Ca....well all that is between El Centro and Yuma Az. Then I went to some God forsak'n lake what was suggested by a fellow camper...Mitrey Lake or something like that. Went I got there...I see water...way the hell over there. Drove for miles look'n for a space big enough for "Sally da house" but there weren't none. All fill up with Prevo's and Greyhound busses. Then....there weren't no place to turn around....I mean none. Drove all the way to the Yuma Test Grounds before I was able to turn this long sucker back the other way. Pull in one spot I thought I might stay at for a few days. Hey...the water is 1/4 mile away and is that mud I see over there?

So's....here what I done. Left Mitrey Lake the same way I came in and drove a few miles to "da pond". That where I am and that where I gonna stay....till they tell me I have to go. But....Hazel told me most of the spots were empty....that what she said. Well, old Billy Bob is parked right next to the road what ain't no park place. But it is now....till the run me off....or a better site come available. Almost turn "Sally" over com'n down that hill back there. Sheesh....wrong entrance.

I don't know what happen between last year and now, but there are reeds...or what ever they call them...all growed up in my "secret hole". Now what ya gonna do Billy Bob??? I were think'n blow'n up that rubber boat under my bed and go'n out there and cut them suckers down. But who gonna help old Billy Bob out the water? I sure's hell don't wanna drown in 4 feet water.

Gonna catch me a fish!!!!

Monday, February 8, 2010

Sneak'n out

I were gonna sneak out of here but I got caught load'n up stuff. Here come three people say'n..."what ya think you're do'n"??? Turn out, we had a big spaghetti dinner tonight around a blaz'n campfire. Twenty one showed up when they hear "free food". While around the campfire, some lady popped the question. "Are  ya leaving tomorrow with out say'n good bye"? To keep with the tradition of old Billy Bob I says..."if'n the spaghetti don't make me sick, yes I'll be pull'n out tomorrow". That when the cook lit into me with both feet. I were jis kid'n...sheesh!!!

If things go as planned, I can hook up "that jeep" and be on the road by bout 11am. Get that other eye open ya know. Still have to dump my tanks, fill up with propane and add some fuel to "Sally da house". Figger that take right bout an hour what would put me in Yuma a few hours later....just in time to catch my dinner....with out a fish license. Yes, I gonna get one....only not today.

Although, I do hate to leave all these nice people. But damn, I been here long enough. Lug Nut ain't gonna be happy bout leaving. That dog knows everyone at the slabs in a half mile radius from home. Surprisingly, they all know his name. Word travels fast at the slabs. Sadie could care less where we are...as long as she is sit'n under my chair out on "da porch" where I'm sip'n a cup and think'n.

May make a post tomorrow....but don't lose any sleep over it. When I get x'citis, I'll let ya know.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Still bask'n at the slabs

Ok....who broke into my WIFI??? I were sit'n here mind'n my own business and I see my modem lights were fliker'n like crazy...what the hell???...I weren't online. Then when I went to get online, my wifi was no longer secured. Someone done hack me. Now how the hell they do that???

An old injury come back to haunt me yesterday, what put me out of commission most the day. Ya see, it's like this....many year ago I hurt my back purty bad. Spent some time in the hospital, a hunnert chiropractors twist'n and pop'n stuff, pain pills by the mouth full, 6 months on the floor and "special" massages. That were the first time.....then it happen again...two more time. One time ya injure a back, it there for the rest of your life. Ain't no two way bout it.

Holy Crap....it's rain'n. Bet this don't last long.

Well I run that "da house" propane tank plumb empty last night....right in the middle of fix'n something to eat. Now for some people this would would be a tragic disaster...ya know, like a hurricane or an earthquake or something like that. But old Billy Bob come to the slabs prepared. Hook up 5 gallon tank, regulator and hose and back to cook'n in 5 minutes.

Ain't no good news. Tried them all...ABC, NBC, MSNBC, CBS, FOX, HUFFINGTON POST...all them. But I get a kick of all the comments "we the people" have to say. It's really scary the way my neighbor talks bout me, call'n me names and stuff. Oh...they mentioned your name too. A sad day is a com'n in this country. Not that it ain't sad now, but ya just wait and see...all hell gonna break loose. Then who ya gonna blame it on???

Rain gone...poooof....just like that. Can ya measure rainfall by drops???

Neighbor lady come over this morn'n and let the dogs out....then she waked me up. Now what with that??? I done tell her I weren't interested in no hanky panky stuff. Sheesh!!! Very nice lady.....but.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Ain't do diddly squat

That what I gonna do....nuttin.

Had an old ugly "tom" cat live in the basement one time what were call Clyde. He were the biggest old tom cat I ever saw....and mean...let me tell ya. When that cat bite ya, ya knowed ya was bit.....blood and stuff. He come out from under a box of something and just bite ya for no reason. Well, I took a lik'n to that old cat. Start talk'n to him....."gd cat", "here kitty...gd cat", "oh shit...gd cat", "git off me....gd cat. He attack who ever go in the basement and that where I did my "mak'n stuff" and think'n.  After a while he would just sit there and stare at me with them big ol' green eyes....then he would come out and say "ya wanna fight"???

Bought a house up in the holler and stated mov'n in. Every time we go back to the old place for another load, there was Clyde sit'n on the porch...just look'n.....ready to strike.....like a snake. A week went by and the kids were ask'n bout old Clyde..."are we gonna go back and get Clyde"? Well we did. I still carry the marks to prove it.

Clyde jump out the car and look around...."is this my new house"??? He inspect everything. Then he start mark'n stuff....."this is mine"....squirt...."this is mine too"....squirt. He done mark every bush, tree and fence post on the place. Since there weren't no basement, Clyde slept in the kitchen...or any other place he felt fit to plant hisself. Ya didn't mess with Clyde.

In the holler lived a pack of wild dogs what would roam day and night kill'n anything they could find. Chickens, turkeys, gooses, stray cats and little dogs. Well Clyde done mark his territory and that was his. He lit into one them dogs and send that dog down the road....just like that. Then he got a nuther one. Weren't no time at all and them wild dogs were gone...never see them again.
Clyde was a good cat.

Did up the dishes yesterday so it was a good day. Sit outside on "da porch", soak up some sunshine, sip'n a cup and think'n.

Billy Bob ain't feel'n so good so he ain't in no hurry to load up "Sally da house" and move. So....don't get to think'n that just 'cause I say I gonna go somewhere or do something that it gonna happen right now. Neighbor lady come over and says, "Billy, you look like ya gonna die". "Are ya eating"??? "Doughnuts aren't food". "What's that smell"??? "When the last time you took a bath"??? "Do you want me to rub your back"??? "You need to walk"!!! That did it....I ain't gonna walk no where. What the hell is she think'n? 

Got myself up early this morning....just 'cause. It ain't like I have something press'n to do today, Just another day. But I been think'n....

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Remember when????

What we gonna talk bout today??? How bout we just ramble for a while and see what come up?

Didn't post the last two days 'cause there weren't nuttin to say...didn't do a damn thing other than read and play golf on "da playstation". Plus, I feel like crap. Two days I have blood pressure problems, but they seem to be just fine this morning. Been cold all over and stay inside....feet feel like ice burgs. Then I had a headache. Found out it was from my hair tie thingy too tight. Now I'm hungry.

Did I ever tell ya bout the time......I were liv'n on my boat with a little dog name JoJo. Now JoJo were a special dog. Did pretty much what he wanted to do....run the docks hunert mile a hour....pee on every thing in sight....talk to the neighbors...waller in old dead fish..... He were a dog!!! Here a link to "JoJo Super Dog".

Speak'n of writ'n.....back when I lived on the boat, I had a web site call Barnacle Bill's Place. Wrote a couple stories ya might find amusing.... click here.

I'm bout out of propane again. Been stay'n myself too comfortable and warm. But I plan't it that way. What I were gonna do is run slap out and have to go to town for more, but head to Yuma since town is on the way.

Today I rekon I better go outside and load up all the junk I got lay'n on the ground since I ain't com'n back. Boy howdy, how the hell I got so much stuff lay'n on the ground. Gonna take a couple hour to put it all away. But then, I ain't got nuttin but time anyhows. What the hurry???